Song of the Month - December 2024 - "Bigger Than You"

I started understanding that the world was bigger than me as a 47 year old. That’s a long time to go without acknowledging this basic fact about the world.

By then, I was a couple of years into a desk job at a law firm that would take me several more years into the future. I’d struggled greatly with day jobs in my life, but at this one, I finally realized I could do it. I wasn’t going to have to quit because I found the work or my boss or this or that co-worker intolerable.

This came as a relief to me. I come from a long line of people who work. My family places a great deal of value in getting up every weekday and doing what you’re supposed to do for eight hours, and I absorbed that value. Even when I managed for 12 years to skip having anything resembling a day job, I worked at writing or music-making for eight hours a day, five days a week. I couldn’t allow myself that kind of good fortune without putting in my (admittedly pleasurable) work every day. I also knew that gravy train would end someday, and I wanted to secure some other foothold as an artist before that day came.

My good luck eventually ran out—or ran down enough to no longer meet my needs—and I was still no closer to securing that new foothold. By 2015, I found myself reluctantly heading back into the work force.

It was disappointing at first. I’ll never forget, once I got the job at the law firm, the subsequent trip to JCPenney. I thought I needed oxford shirts (law firm, right? You wear oxfords, right? I didn’t know it was a casual office), but I had no idea my size, neck size, arm length. I had to take at least a dozen pins out of each shirt before I could try it on—only to find out it was the wrong size. That was a long day in the dressing room.

I struggled at that job for the first 18 months, but I eventually got good enough at it that even the occasional berating from my boss didn’t fill me with dread. I hung in there, put up with rough treatment, and wound up staying for seven years. I would probably still be there if they hadn’t decided in 2022 they would no longer employ anyone who lived outside of a few eastern states. (It had become a remote job by then.) I was cast aside, but that was okay. I’d learned what I’d needed to learn.

So, give a listen to “Bigger than You.” I don’t expect to be so passive in 2025, so enjoy it while it lasts.

Budapalooza is coming to town! This version happens on December 13th at 5 pm PST. This is the easiest way to enjoy live music in the history of the universe. You don’t have to leave your home! I play songs solo acoustic, and you watch and listen and eat your tacos. All you have to do is follow me at Bandcamp, and you’re golden. Everything is free! RSVP!

Happy Holidays!